On Friday night in midtown Manhattan, my main man Plaxico went out to the Latin Quarter and shot himself in the leg. Plax, I love you, and you’ll always be my boy, but how stupid can you be?!? I’ve disagreed with my coaches. I’ve had quarrels with the media. But one thing that Darnell Goodman […]
As though having to spend all day on Thanksgiving with my little sister wasn’t enough, I also had to sit through another pathetic Lions game. Unless you’re Helen Keller, it shouldn’t be too hard to see that this franchise is in serious trouble. Even though the Lions will likely get the number one draft pick […]
It’s been a rough year for Norm Brooks. First Tom Brady went down, then he lost his job, and finally his wife Cynthia kicked him out of the house when he wouldn’t stop mumbling “Plaxico” in his sleep. But Norm’s been given a second chance, and at the urging of Cynthia’s psychologist, Cynthia has invited […]
As we approach the fantasy football playoffs, it’s frustrating to think back to the beginning of the year when I was so full of optimism. Not only did I have Tom Brady and Braylon Edwards, but I also had a roof over my head. Today, as I look back at a season of ups and […]
A top draft pick out of Florida State University, Darnell Goodman was supposed to be the next Jerry Rice. Parcells even called him “a sure thing.” But after inking a multi-million dollar deal, Darnell spent more time playing Madden in his smoke filled living room than he did getting ready for the NFL, and he […]
I don’t know if it’s the freezing cold here in Philly or the fact that I just witnessed fat Andy bench our most reliable veteran, but I’m numb right now. Seeing Donovan on the sideline, I can’t help but think about my experience last winter. It was late in the season and things just weren’t […]
In life, everyone has his own calling. Some are drawn to helping others, while others are cut out for a specific skill or trade; some take years to discover their gift, while others know from a young age where their talents lie. In the case of Norm Brooks, he discovered his calling last fantasy football […]
Often times, my patients tell me that I don’t know “what it’s like” or that I have no idea “what they’re going through.” This is a common assumption that many pregnant women have regarding the men in their life. But I’m a bit different. I understand what it’s like to feel crappy for 9 months […]
Dear Roger Goodell, Where did we go wrong? Was it the gambling controversy? The “uncensored” interview I gave Flavor Flav? Or the three hundred pounds of weed they found in my trunk when I was napping in the parking lot of Jack in the Box? Rest assured, Commissioner, I’ve changed. I found Jesus. I’m not […]
Here at the Global Sports Fraternity, we take public health issues extremely seriously. So when we learned of the unfortunate case of Norm Brooks and his severe addiction to fantasy sports, we took it upon ourselves to make a PSA regarding the dangers of this epidemic. You may think it could never happen to you. […]
With the fantasy football trade deadline approaching, you might be wondering: how does a fantasy expert like myself ensure that my deals go through? Blackmail. Remember your brother-in-law’s bachelor party? Those pictures aren’t just good for the memories. When Carl wouldn’t trade me Anquan Boldin last year, his wife (my sister) received a couple photos […]
Having just begun the second half of the NFL season, one thing has become abundantly clear: more than anything, the success of a team depends on quarterback play. Like me, Donovan McNabb has been having a respectable year. So how come the Green Machine sits at the bottom of the NFC East? Look no further […]
