These days, everyone’s on twitter…and “everyone” now includes Ozzie Guillen. That’s right, the foul-mouthed Venezuelan fired off his first tweets earlier this week, and despite the fact that the White Sox are unhappy that their manager will now be tweeting, Ozzie’s determined “to have fun with it.”
Already he’s off to a fantastic start, giving us insights into the game (“3 day of Spring Training and im already boreddddddd”), his personal life (“Iam tired from bad very bad golf”), and his eating habits (“going to eat in half hour why dye no have a job ?”). Heck, he’s even given twitter the official Guillen stamp of approval: “i like it the twitter.….”
But this is the one and only Ozzie Guillen, and you never know what’s gonna come out of his mouth next. So we thought that we’d put together a list of tweets we hope to see on Ozzie’s timeline that Ozzie should probably avoid.
1.) peavy mow down opposition like the Hugo Chavez 2day but less rape
2.) i no mind gettin ejected cuz my hemorrhoid flare up
3.) @Jerry_Reinsdorf did u forget to wipe? ur office smell like shittttt
4.) goin home to bang wife and watch sabado gigante yeeessssssss
5.) i no scared of the detroit jim leyland gay like mariotti
6.) why all chink pitchers throw underhand??????????
7.) @RosettaStone chinga tu madre
8.) dogdayz of summer = swamp ass 4 ozzie
9.) @Ricky_Martin if i no baseball manager i be ur roadie but not cuz i gay
10.) Yesssssss! RT @Bud_Selig Anyone ever get a pack of sunflower seeds that tastes like pussy?
And for your viewing pleasure: