“A New Low” by Norm Brooks
This morning I was fortunate enough to sneak into my buddy Greg’s basement so that I could adjust my squad on his computer. It had been a few days since I’d gotten online, and I happened to notice that I was approaching the Innings Pitched limit — I would only be able to start pitchers in favorable situations for the rest of the year. Seeing that Mark Buehrle was playing the Rays, and he was only two starts removed from an 8-run outing, I decided to keep him on the bench.
Unless you are living under a rock, you know how this ends. And believe me, it’s not pretty.
I’d thought that I hit rock bottom last fall when the Browns benched Derek Anderson and I had to start turning tricks in public bathrooms just to get by. But this is a new low in my fantasy career, and let’s face it, my life. Not only did I miss a perfect game, but I broke the window on the way out of Greg’s basement, and that’s gonna run me at least three months worth of panhandling. His wife is a real bitch.
Category: Baseball