Norm Brooks, the fantasy sports addict, just didn’t see this one coming. Last Tuesday, while collecting bottles and cans, Norm spotted a half-eaten hamburger in the trash, and, believing that it looked reasonably fresh, scarfed it down. Having been given the nickname “Iron Colon” by some of the guys down at the shelter, Norm assumed his body could take it.
But, like his decision to draft Jason Schmidt (again) this year, Norm was completely off base. The bacteria in that hamburger ripped apart his stomach lining like a war torn Rwandan village. And while it’s not very well-known outside the diehard fantasy sports community, Norm contracted the horrific disease known as MDD, or Mad Draft Disease.
It’s one thing to be a fantasy sports addict…but foaming at the mouth? Norm, please see a doctor.